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  • Nikky

What is the motivation behind your behavior, decisions and actions ? - Fear or love

From the time we are very little we observe our environment and learn that we ought to make decisions and live our lives based on a fear of something imagined and unwanted happening in either our near or distant future.

As an example, we are told to

  • Study so that we don't fail - Failing becomes fearful for us

  • Have good manners so that we can please other people - We develop a fear of displeasing others

  • Make friends so that we are not left alone at school during recess - We develop a fear of being alone

  • Choose a career that pays well and has respect in society - We develop beliefs around our identity and value being linked to what we do.

What happens when we as adults start to make decisions in our life based on fear rather than what excites us, what gives us joy or what we love doing?

Firstly, we lose touch with what our inner guidance is telling us. We close our heart center and lose ourselves in the business of protecting ourselves and our loved ones from this very possible but imagined fear of what could go wrong.

We also lose faith in the knowing we were born with, that if we are happy and focused on what gives us pleasure then all will be always well. We also came with the knowledge that contrast or challenging times are a necessary part of the process of living a fulfilled life as through contrast we get clear with what we do want. And the process of creating what we want is why we are here.

The other downside of living in fear of something unwanted happening to us or our children is that all that resistance attracts to us exactly what we have been avoiding or resisting.

Apart from the fact that feeling fear in your present moment keeps you from being present in the now and tending to your current vibration.

A better way of living your life would be to develop beliefs around what serves you well and that are rooted in love rather than fear. Watch your intentions while making decisions.

Let the motivation for your decisions be the present rather than a fearful future.

As in -

  • Study for the love of learning

  • Have good manners to appreciate and empathize with others

  • Be at peace being by yourself, activate happiness being on your own and inspire others to be around you to share those good feelings.

  • Choose a career that you love, that you wouldn't mind spending most of your days at. Know that if you are happy doing what you love, you will get money and respect.

  • Make small adjustments in your language especially if you are raising kids - As an example - instead of asking them to brush their teeth because the germs will eat them up replace it with, encouraging them to brush so that their teeth our shiny and sparkly.

  • Save money because you want to manage your money better, rather than because of the fear of being insecure or in situations where you need the money and you don't have it.

  • Take small steps to launch your business idea because of the love and passion you feel for that idea rather than staying safe because of a fear of an imagined future.

What is the motivation behind your behavior, decisions and actions ?

I invite you to think about this question and try to live more from a trusting and knowing place that everything will turn out well and is happening for your growth rather than living from a place of fear.

If you want support and guidance while you work through your inner beliefs and thought patterns please reach out to me at

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